


10 Wishes

by sailor_lee



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Hinata Shouyou Needs a Hug, Hurt, Hurt Hinata Shouyou, Hurt Kageyama Tobio, Kageyama Tobio is Bad at Feelings, M/M, Protective Karasuno Volleyball Club, Team Mom Sugawara Koushi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:20:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27888184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sailor_lee/pseuds/sailor_lee
Summary: Hinata Shouyou was a lot of things energetic, friendly, happy but healthy was not one of those many things.A world where Hinata is diagnosed with a disease and he has the option to die painlessly and quickly or slow and painful. (but of course, he chooses slow and painful). Hinata tells no one but Suga finds out and agrees to grant 10 of Hinata's wishes.(I'm bad at summarising give it a chance
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Everyone, Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Comments: 2
Kudos: 94





	1. Chapter 1

~beginning of flashback~

Hinata's eyes frantically moved around the room, he was ready for someone to pop out and tell him that this was a joke. But no one did. He didn't even realize the loud screaming and crying was his until his mom pulled him into a hug and whispered words like _"sorry, its all my fault, if only you weren't my son this wouldn't be happening to you"_

They weren't the words Hinata to hear ~~he wanted her to tell him everything was going to be okay.~~

The doctor's face was blank as he proceeded to explain how and when Hinata was going to die. In 3-5 months. Maybe it was because the doctor was so used to telling people things like this, or maybe he was used to breaking people's families apart in the same fashion over and over again. Hinata didn't even mean to start yelling at the doctor but he couldn't help it. These words and feelings pulsed around every part of his being making its way through his fingertips, to his toes through his ears. But he didn't know how to express it he wasn't sure if he wanted to scream or cry or both. His mom was holding his shoulders back as he kept yelling harsh words at the doctor. He wanted to stop but he couldn't, he was already losing control of his body he doesn't know if that's him or the disease talking but he hates himself even more because of it.

"I'm sorry but it's true." The doctor's face twitched a little as he walked out the room letting the mother and son sit in silence before Hinata's mother finally spoke up. 

"I'm-" She started

"Sorry?" Hinata finished as he flashes a smile at her. "It's okay, I just- want to live like a normal boy as long as I can live like I was before i wanna still be me" he paused between every word.

"Shouyou, you know you can't..." his mom said bluntly, tears filling in her eyes. Shouyou ignored her and walked out of the room slamming the door. He was still Hinata Shouyou, it didn't matter if his bones were going to slowly decay or he was going to slowly forget everything he was still him and he was going to make sure of that ~~even if it was the last thing he was gonna do.~~

~end of flashback~

"Hinata-kun! Hinata-kuuuuun!" Hinata stared at his classmate dazed from daydreaming before finally understanding what was happening.

"Yes?!?!" He replied a little too loudly noticing how the remaining people in the classroom flinched ~~he has got to get used to his hearing worsening.~~ ~~~~

"An upperclassman is here for you." The classmate said as goes back to cleaning. Hinata walks towards the door and notices the familiar silver hair glowing from sun.

"Sugawara-senpai?" Hinata asked as he tilts his head in confusion.

"Hinata. Can we talk?" Suga says with a dark look on his face. Hinata nods more confused than he was was before. Suga starts walking and Hinata follows before Hinatat knew it they were in the park.

"Senpai?" Hinata asks as Suga sits down on a bench.

"I have a part time job." Suga starts, Hinata looked at Suga. "I saw you." He finishes.

"Is that bad?" Hinata asked Suga as he took a seat on the bench next to Suga.

"Hinata, my part time job is right in front of the hospital. More specifically a hospital the treats special cases. More specifically cases that cant be treated." Hinata fliched at this ~~he knows,he knows,he knows.~~ Hinata gives Suga a bittersweet smile.

"Suga-senpai, Have you ever heard of Body deterioration? Well, more specifically body decay when you are still alive. I'ts very rare only 1 out of 1,000,000 people have it." Hinata stops to see Suga's reaction. Hes frozen. Hinata continues wind slightly pushing around his ginger hair. "Your bones start decaying, your heart gets weaker causing your blood to clump and clog, parts of your brain shuts down causing you to forget. First, its basic things like how to walk and then how to talk and then it goes onto bigger things like who you know, where you live, where you are...who you are." Hinata trails off. "And after all that your organs slowly fail one after another which i looked up it doesn't hurt, but when your body decays your pain doubles until its so painful you cant feel anything anymore."

"Why are you telling me this?" Suga asks already knowing the answer he just wanted the possibility he was wrong. Hinata stands up and takes one of Suga's hands.

.

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"I'm dying."


	2. Chapter 2

"Are you going to quit volleyball?" Suga asks as gently grabs the plastic of the meat bun's him and Hinata shared from the ginger's hand and throws it in the trash next to the park bench before taking his seatback. Right next to Hinata.

"I" Hinata starts, "I don't know. Obviously, I can't jump around and do the things that I'm good at. I mean, my body is slowly decaying from the inside so no." He finishes his eyes never leaving his hands.

"What are you doing? I mean why are you still here? Not like in a bad way just why?" Suga asks cautiously as though the words coming out of his mouth were not already harsh as is. "I know, but I want to be Hinata Shouyou as long as I can be. I don't want to give in to this disease pulling out of school and all the things I like would be like admitting I'm going to die and I'm not. I'm just fine." Hinata says in a reassuring manner. At first glance, it would look like he was reassuring Suga. But, in reality, he was reassuring himself. Hinata Shouyou was nowhere ready to die.

Suga's eyes studied Hinata. His hands were gripping his school uniform very tightly his knuckles whiting, even move, every second. Eye bags painting every crease of his undereye. As well as his naturally vibrant Ginger hair diming into a dark and dull form of orange and worst of all his normally tan skin had faded into a sickly pale shade of white tinted with green and blue.

"Hinata." Hinata's dazed eyes met Suga's. "Are you taking care of yourself?" After a moment of silence, Hinata finally answered.

"Suga-senpai, do you ever wonder how things might change if you act like they don't exist?" Hinata scoffs a little before looking away from Suga. They stay like this for 2 minutes before Suga looks over his side to reveal an unconscious Hinata. "Hinata?" Suga says as he gently shakes the younger boy. And does it again when he doesn't respond and again and again. Suga panics and feels for a pulse at the unconscious boy's wrist. It was weak. In a panic, Suga pulls out his phone and calls for an ambulance. Once they get there, they place Hinata on a stretcher and place him in the vehicle and the only thing Suga can do is watch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> is Hinata dead who knows... he might be or not..?  
> Also if he does survive I'm not gonna be specific with the time, you're not gonna know how many months he has to lie when he dies he'll die no warning. 
> 
> I'm gonna put 2 options in a spinner and whatever wins, wins. Whether he lives or dies depends on a digital spinner.


	3. the book

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The chapters are probably going to get wayyyy longer after this one. I've just been lazy.

Suga wasn't the type to look at people further than what the smile they put on every day, take Hinata for example. Even though Suga didn't put the effort into looking past his obvious facade of Smiles and Jumps. He could obviously tell something was wrong. it was like he could almost feel Hinata's energy leaving him he talked less, his jumps got shorter and worse. But, even though he noticed he kept quiet, and maybe this is why he's here. The truth is Suga saw Hinata coming out of the hospital many times before. He was always too afraid to ask but to his luck, the day he finally did the boy passes out and he's now sitting next to an unconscious version of him urging him to wake up.

"Suga-san?" A voice dry and choppy from the lack of use came from the fresh conscious boy.

"Oh God Hinata! I have to call the Doctor." Suga said hands rapidly in search for the button to contact out of panic. A cold hand loosely positioned on Suga's elbow to get him to stop.

"Don't. I'm okay." Hinata said coldly as he readjusted in the hospital bed. "I have something to ask you." Suga's focus' on the boy, his eye bags look deeper and darker, and just looks tired. Just tired.

"Yeah, what is it?" Hinata's eyes find Suga and they look at each other for a good 4 minutes before Hinata finally speaks up.

"Will you kill me?" Hinata asks never averting his eyes. The blood drained from Suga's face he honestly didn't know what to say and the blank, emotionless expression on Hinata's face wasn't helping.

"Hinata." Suga starts.

"I'm just kidding." Hinata cuts him off making noises sounding like pained laughs. "Can you open up my bookbag and take out the blue book?"

Suga nods and searches for the book bag and eventually finds it next to the clothes Hinata was previously before he passed out on the park bench. He finds the blue book in Hinata's bookbag before pulling it out slowly. It was a small book almost like a diary. Uneven pages sticking out of the ends and a pen nicely tucked at the back. He hand's Hinata the book carefully before taking a seat on the edge of the bed.

"I'm going to die soon," Hinata says eyes never leaving the light blue book he grips onto it firmly. He steals a quick glance from Suga to ensure his attention. His expression was mixed with shock and acceptance almost as if he knew that what Hinata was saying was true but he was still in disbelief. Hinata continued.

"This book..." he pauses and swiftly glides his finger across the pages. "Is full of my dying wishes. I want you to do them."

"No," Suga answers before standing up from the end of the bed.

"No?"

"Yes, no what even are you thinking? Don't think just because your dying I have some type of obligation to take care of all these things."

"So, you aren't gonna help me?"

"I'll help you, but I'm not doing it alone. You are going to fulfill whatever dying wishes you have."

"I was planning on that." Hinata beams and places the book in Suga's hand lightly tugging him to sit back down on the bed which he does. Suga opens up the book to reveal fairly neat handwriting saying "10 wishes." with a subtitle that read " _By Hinata Shoyou."_

 _"_ Flip to the very last page," Hinata says as he grips on his blanket. "Don't uh- Read the rest of the pages ~~until I die."~~

Suga flips to the last page and the first thing that catches his eyes is the fact the paper was stapled in. It was a different type of paper than the other ones in the notebook.

" ~~Tell Kageyama the truth.~~ Break up with Kageyama(make him hate you if you can)."

"Why did you cross out telling Kageyama the truth?" Hinata ruffles his hair a bit before stopping abruptly and looking at Suga.

"Suga, I don't want him to live for me." Suga flinches at the sudden drop of honorifics. "I don't want to be his motivation for why he does things. I don't-" His voice breaks.

"I don't want him to be dependent on me even after death, He needs to learn how to live by himself." Hinata pauses to quickly wipe off the tears welling up in his eyes. "without me."

The two sat in silence.

"Why do you want him to hate you? So he forgets you. You know it's never that easy."

"I know that. It's not for him its for me."Hinata's scans the room before finishing. "I don't want anyone to love me when I leave the Earth, I want to leave with no love. In fact, it'd be better if I could leave without any emotions attached to me. I don't want anyone to feel anything towards me."


	4. flowers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for all the Kudos <3 I love you all this chapter is a little longer but I plan on making them EVEN longer for all of my babes here. I'll link my discord server here soon as soon as I figure out how incase yall want to drop some prompts for me to write once I complete this story. <33

"Let's break up," Hinata says with a stoic expression on his face. As he gazes out at the large fields of flowers. Kageyama looks at him for a minute before grabbing onto one of his arms.

"Break up? What do you mean? Shouyou this isn't funny..." Kageyama says as he twists the skinny boy's body so they're facing each other. Hinata averts his eyes but steals a glance at Kageyama's blue eyes glazed with unshed tears. Hinata pulls off Kageyama's trembling hands from his shoulders and picks up and Lilac. 

"Tobio-Kun, Do you know the meaning of the flower Lilac?" Hinata walks away from Kageyama and stands on the edge of the cliff of flowers before facing him again. Kageyama was frozen. "Mainly ita about Love and passion and things about first love." Hinata continues and he crushes the purple flower and scraps the pedals off the palms of his hands. "So what do I mean when I do this." He blows the pedals he scraps up." And jumps backward off the cliff. Kageyama quickly runs up and embraces him.

Both of them tumble to the ground landing in a garden of flowers. Hinata rolls over from Kageyama's chest.

"I can't love you anymore," Hinata confesses with a defeated expression. "You need to let me go." Hinata finishes coughing in between each word.

"But why?" Kageyama sighs. It hadn't been the first time Hinata tried to pull something like this. A few months ago he tried to break up with Kageyam because he thought that he was useless. (it was around the time where he pulled out his knee.) Kageyama had to take about 4 hours to reasure him that he would love him no matter what. But this feels different. ~~It feels real.~~

And even though Kageyama is particularly used to these random outbreaks. They still hurt him. Kageyama flips onto his side and really takes a look at Hinata. He looked so defeated, So tired. Eyebags painted his under eyes, the usual feel to him was gone. ~~He looked empty.~~

"I know." Kageyama looks away for a second before looking at Hinata again. "Your mom told me."

"She did?" Hinata shot up and grabbed the other boy. "WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME YOU KNEW? How long?" Hinata's voice broke.

"I've known since the day after. She called me to make sure you were...well ok?" Hinata's mom loved Kageyama. Because she knew of Hinata's urges she understood that she couldn't make Him happy enough to get him to say. So she left it to Kageyama, ~~Kageyama was the only thing that has kept Hinata alive this past year. Even volleyball wasn't enough to fill his emptiness.~~

"Why..." Hinata was sobbing into Kageyama's chest. " I needed you. I wanted you to be there for me. I still love you."

.

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Hinata blinks his eyes.

"Kageyama. Let's break up." He glances back at the taller boy.

"Okay." He says back "I'll break up with you. Only if you tell me what the fuck has been going on with you these past 2 weeks." Kageyama grabs Hinata by the hand before he can turn away like he always does.

"What are you even talking about? Just because I want to break up with doesn't automatically mean there is something wrong with me." Hinata scoffs forcing out resentment in his voice.

"Hinata, I'm not dumb I've noticed. So, what the hell is going on with you?" Kageyama ask as he moves closer and attempts to pull Hinata into a hug.

"I cheated on you." Hinata says as he moves back from Kageyama's attempted hug. "It was two weeks ago. At the p-" Kageyama covers hinata's mouth with the palm of his hand.

"I don't want to hear anymore." Kageyama says obviously distraught his voice was filled with sadness as he picked up his school bag and walked away before stealing one last look at hinata. Hinata looked away desperate to hide the tears welling up in his eyes.

"I love you." He whispered as he fell to the floor week from being up and about for too long. He admires the scenery, it was a secret place that Kageyama had found just for him. He always went on and on and on about flowers so on their first Kageyama blind folded him and took him to a place full of flowers. Hinata picks up a stick and uses it as support and drously walks to the tree where him and Kageyama carved in their initials. On about the 6th date Kageyama jokingly wrote "SK" for Shouyou Kageyama and it made Hinata blush all over. Hinata ran his fingers around the initials giving himself blisters. And he starts sobbing.

"Kageyama!" Hinata yells again and again until his throat is dry and his voice is hoarse he drops his temporary walking stick and attempts to crawl over, but stops after realising Kageyama was long gone. ~~He had been gone for a while.~~

"Hinata?" Suga calls walking up the hill. He quickly runs to pick up the limp Hinata and asks if hes okay. Hinata nods slowly and sinks his head into Suga's shoulders. And they sit there like that. Hinata crying into Suga's shoulder whispering kageyama's name. And suga silent but occasionally runs his hand through Hinata's hair or pat on his back.

"Suga-senpai, I'm an idiot arent I? I could have just told him. I-I could have just said what was going on and he would still be here with me." Hinata says pulling away and staring at Suga's eyes. Suga doesn't speak.

"I love him. And I know its corny but is it wrong for me to do this? Am I making things more painful for me?" Hinata sobs. "Is this all for nothing? I just want everyone to be the same when I'm gone. But, what about me? What happens to me? What even is death like?" Hinata looks up at the sky. Suga still doesn't speak.

"What if I could just become a star?" Hinata laughs a little before the laugh turns into a cry. He coughs on his hand revealing blood.

"why cant I just ~~die already?"~~ He falls unconscious. Suga just sits there admiring the new stars. He's not the comforting type, he couldn't find the right words to say to Hinata. What even can you say to a dying person? What words should he say to make Hinata feel better? ~~He cant. No one can.~~

Suga picks up Hinata and slings him around to his back and carries him home.

"Suga-senpai? Can you kill me?" Hinata says as he blinks awake tightening his hold around Suga.


	5. Chapter 5

Suga places Hinata on his hospital bed gently and stares at the ginger for a little bit taking in reality again. ~~He's gonna die soon.~~ Suga quickly shakes off the thought and walks out of the room and he quickly runs outside realizing visiting time is almost over. As soon as his feet touched the gray concrete outside the hospital the tension he didn't even feel residing in his shoulders went away. And then he walked home _slowly_ , lately, he's come to admire the small things of life like the stars. He used to hate the stars because they were so out of reach and they reminded him of how unspecial he was.

Suga walked home admiring the grass too and the way the water stuck to them and eventually fell onto the ground ~~it~~ ~~reminded him of Hinata.~~

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The next day, Suga found himself walking down the same hospital floors for the 4th time this week, it had become a ~~habit.~~ He somehow started to form a relationship with the person he hated the most. Once he finally reached Hinata's room he stood in front of the door for a little bit to check and make sure Hinata's family wasn't there. He doesn't want them to think they were close or something because, in reality, Hinata only let him know because of the fact that they weren't close at all. As soon as Suga was sure that Hinata's family wasn't there he opened the door only to reveal an empty room. A nurse tapped on Suga's shoulder.

"Hinata-kun said that he was going to go to the gym to watch the volleyball game that goes on every week. Although he should be back by now because it ended 40 minutes ago. Maybe he's having trouble with his wheelchair! If that's the case can you please go check up on him?"

Suga nodded his head before giving the nurse a quick bow and running off to the gym. He had been there before with Hinata in the earlier days before his condition was bad enough that he needed a wheelchair Suga set to him and he spiked them down. Before Suga knew it he was standing in front of the door of the gym. For some reason he was scared to go in it was like he had a bad feeling but despite this, he pushed through the door. And what he saw made his heart drop to his gut. Hinata was laying down looking lifeless with a tiny pool of blood next to him under the volleyball net on the wood floor. His wheelchair had rolled to the other side of the gym and was flipped over to its side.

Suga quickly ran over to his side to check for a pulse and slowed down when he heard soft whimpers and hushed cries and flipped Hinata over to reveal a distraught and dazed version of the ginger.

"Are you in any pain?" Suga sighed. This had happened before but at the time Hinata's condition wasn't as bad as it was now. He could still walk on his own but he was pretty weak and needed Suga to help him up a lot.

"I just wanted to fly one more time," Hinata said breaking Suga from his thoughts. Hinata looks up at Suga for some form of validation. "Is that wrong?" He asks tears filling his eyes.

Suga pauses for a minute and thinks about what to say, after all, he has no way of knowing how Hinata must feel. Volleyball ~~is~~ was Hinata's life, it was the only that made Hinata happy. Hinata grabbed onto the end of Suga's pants knocking him out of his thoughts once again.

"Suga? I'm right, right?" Hinata's breathing quickens and more tears drop down his face. " They lied! They said I could still be normal." Hinata's voice broke. Suga didn't know how to respond so he just stood there watching Hinata cry and scream. 

"Why can't I just go back? I don't want to live like this anymore. I-i can't take this anymore." Hinata says as he starts to drag his body across the gym and grabs onto the side of the net to stand.

"Suga, will you let me fly one more time?" Hinata tries to jump with the support of the pole of the volleyball net but falls down causing the cut on his ankle to bleed more from the previous attempts. 

"Hinata, stop it your hurting yourself," Suga says as he picks up Hinata by the waist and tries to carry him to the wheelchair. But he's interrupted by kicks and the flailings of hands.

"STOP!" Hinata yells. "I-i just want to fly." He jumps out of Suga's grasp and reaches for the next again. Suga thankfully catches him and time and they both collapse on the floor. Hinata starts to sob on Suga's chest.

"Just one more time?" Hinata cries. "One more? Please. Please.Please." He repeats over and over again as a prayer until he falls asleep. Suga notices the lack of movement and quickly checks for a pulse. Once he's assured he gently carries Hinata up and sets him into his wheelchair. And rolls him outside to his room and once he's there he sets Hinata on his bed. And the tears he's been holding in start to pour all over his pants. **_Guilt_**


	6. dried up roses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hey yall I've been gone for a while, I will be finishing this fanfic very soon as well as my other one.

Hinata awakens on his hospital bed staring at the ceiling its white and covered with many black spots he's lately been counting all of them although he has lost count. A few days has passed since his accident with Suga and he hasnt been back since. ~~He wished Suga would come back.~~ Nonetheless, Hinata health had been improving since then but the only reason that is, is because he hasn't left his bed since Suga left. And, to be frank the only good thing about his health was the fact his heart was still beating. Hinata couldnt walk, he could still talk and remember things, however, he's been losing knowledge on basic things. His eyesight was getting worse and worse he could barely make out faces anymore. And that was that.

"Shouyou." A familiar voice calls for him knocking him out of his thoughts. He turns his attention away from the celing to come face to face with the person calling his name. 

"Tobio-" He calls back, and pauses once he realizes that his ex boyfriend who should know nothing about his disease is now in his hospital room. He sits up quickly and regrets it.

"Careful!" The other boy calls as he helps Hinata regain his balance as he was strugguling to readjust himself after sitting up on the bed too quickly. 

"Why? No, how did you know i was here?" Hinata grunts, shoving Tobio's helping hands away from him. Tobio scoffs before reputting his hands in Hinata's and shifting his body so they are eye to eye. 

"Shouyou, im not as dumb as you think," he starts as he intertwine him and Shouyou's fingers together. "I can tell when somthing is going on with you and your mom told me because she knew that me being with you would make you feel better." A tear falls from Shouyou's right eye before another one falls from the left. His ginger eyelashes trapping the tears as he pushes himself into Tobio's arms.

"I missed you," He sobs, Tobio wraps his arms around him. "I didnt want to leave you, but i didnt want you to hate me after i left for not telling you. And i wanted you to miss me when i was gone but i didnt want you to be in pain."

"I love you," Kageyama kisses his forehead and carresses his check wiping the wet tears off. "I have to leave for school. Ill be back after." Hinata stares at Tobio as he walks out the hospital room. Hinata didnt notice that, that many days have passed it would mean that he had been isolating himself in his room for over 3 days. He took the crutch that leaned off the side of his bed and used it to roll his wheelchair towards him.

"Hinata Shouyou?" Hinata's head snapped up and he was facing the doctor who had diagnosed him with his disease as well as help trying to treat him fot these past weeks. "Truthfully, I need your guardian present to tell you this. "

"Just tell me." Hinata said eagerly gripping on the ends of his hospital wear.

"You might have been misdiagnosed."

**Author's Note:**

> Hinata and Suga are not a ship btw just very.very.very. close friends... also excuse my punctuation and stuff idrc but sorry if people actually read this I update when I do...Ill have a real update schedule soon  
> This is heavily inspired by in another life btw


End file.
